on permanence & turning back
hey sole sister,
My heart has something for you today and I hope that it resonates with you. I think from the time we were little, there’s something ingrained in us about permanence. We’re taught from a young age about not putting our hands near the stove and if we touch a hot burner, we will get burned. These are necessary warnings, cautions, protections put in place for our good (and for the good of the parent who would rather not manage a screaming babe with a scorched hand if at all possible). And good parents warn their children about predictable danger. This is necessary and right. But, I think the warning is missing a crucial life lesson. The burn is not the end of the story. The burn is not permanent. It will heal. It will require care and attention, but it will heal. I deal with pain and injuries all day long as the main component of my job. And I watch the God-given miracle worker - the body - do amazing work time after time. Strained muscles, broken bones, torn ligaments, bumps, bruises, and everything in between. My interventions are only meant to enhance the body’s natural healing process. Because it’s so good at it all on its own.
I think the same thing goes for the heart. Heartbreak hurts. Bad. And if you haven’t experienced heart break, you most likely will in some form or another because you’re a human. Womp. Womp. Hate to break it to you. When you’ve desperately prepared yourself for a job and you don’t get it because you didn’t measure up to your competition. When you try for years to get pregnant and after multiple doctors and treatments you find out that the bottom line is: you can’t. When you’ve rejoiced over a pregnancy and then mere weeks later find yourself questioning everything when you see the bleeding. When you are at Target buying another baby shower gift for a friend who is about to welcome their little one and you are in the middle of a miscarriage, or maybe your third one in a row. When you are in your early, middle late, twenties or thirties or forties and watch your sisters and friends meet, date, and marry their husbands and in your deepest being you wonder if that’ll ever be you. When you send your last child to college and you look at your husband and you wonder if you’ll ever reconnect to him because it’s been years since you looked each other in the eye. When your boyfriend leaves because he doesn’t love you anymore and you wonder if anything he ever told you was true. Despite the pain, doubt, fear, disappointment, and questions of worth, we can rejoice because this heartbreak is not permanent. It is not the end of the story. We are not made to endure unending pain. So we cry. We sob. We get mad. We process. We talk it out. We sit with it. We pray. We let others in when we are ready. We put one foot in front of the other. We take a day, a week, a month, or more off of work in order to rest our weary hearts. Just like you would rest a muscle. And slowly, just like a broken bone begins to lay down new bone in the place of the fracture, our hearts begin to heal just the same. One positive experience built on the one before it. We start to rebuild the foundations of our heart on what is true. We replace the made up stories we created out of our suffering about ourselves and about our Holy God and start telling ourselves the actual truth. That we are meaningful. Loved. Important. Valuable. And purposed in this world. Because of our journeys. Not despite them.
The same thing goes for the soul. We were created and sent into this world by God. Each and every one of us. And yet, He created us and longed for us to know Him in return. But He knew we would never measure up to the perfect standard of a perfect God. So His loving nature made a way. He did not keep us in unending suffering, instead He paved a way, through Jesus. Jesus would go on to take on the burden of our shortcomings and failures that, without Jesus, the weight of would cause us to die. Instead of us being crushed into death, He died on our behalf so we could live. Instead of never knowing our creator, God came to us in Jesus to break down the barriers. He. Came. To. Us. He made a way. He changed the potential permanent outcome of our souls and gave us a free, easy, light way out of what would surely kill us. Our bodies, our hearts, and our souls do not have to stay permanently broken. God made a way for us to heal and heal completely.
If you were once healed and now you are feeling broken again, take heart sole sister. This is not the end of the story. There is more to come. Healing is inevitable. Because God made a way for our bodies, our hearts, and our souls to be healed. All we have to do is say, “yes, please.” Yes please to healing of our bodies. Yes please to help through heartbreak. Yes please to Jesus.
Love you mean it,
Catherine
